Jealous of the Pregnancy Forum :P

[Gutter]

I catch myself coming on here over and over again and it's really getting to me. I am really upset that I never got to 'try' for #2 and that it just happened. My pregnancies went by way too fast!!!! Maybe I am going thru that phase during PP when you want another baby who knows....but I am completely done.....

My body could just not handle anymore pregnancies and my brain wouldn't be able to deal with more then 2 kids either, haha!!

I am sooo thrilled of all the pregnant ladies on here, but I feel jealous over you ladies because you still haven't met your babies yet, such an exciting time in your lives. I never really enjoyed being pregnant because when I got pregnant with Audrey, I feared I was going to miscarry again and then had a traumatic delivery (very rewarding though) but took 6 months to bond with my daughter. Then I got pregnant when Audrey was just a little over a year old....planned by DF....I didn't want another baby until Audrey was old enough to really help out and understand the baby thing. So being pregnant with Jasper was really unexpected and I held a grudge with DF because of it.

Anyways I just had to type up my feelings because I wondered why I kept coming on here, lol!!! Well to read about all you lovely ladies who are pregnant of course but then I feel like when I post something I just don't feel like I should (not feeling accepted because I'm not pregnant) because it's not my place anymore.

Maybe this is a good place for those of us who can't have more babies but have the thought every now and again and maybe help each other out and support one another....

Awww, thanks for listening, I just had to put it out there and feel free to delete or move this if it's unacceptable!!

[sparkles]

babe thanks for sharing your feelings and you are ALWAYA welcoe on the pregnancy thread!!! maybe it is you realising that you wont be pregnant again, i can understand that feeling.
I know the jealousy feeling when going onto the boards, when i kept M/C i had to keep away as i found myslef getting jealous ( yet so happy for the pregnanant people of course)
we will all be back on the parent thread soon enough hun and asking for your advise with two kids lol xoxo

[Lily*Blossom]

Oh, Gutter honey I completely understand why you want to post here. I am going through mixed emotions, as this will be our last child, I'm even considering getting my tubes tied after the delivery. I just mentally can't handle the stress of another pregnancy, and this makes 3 children total for our family (Including my step son), and my DH can't handle the financial responsibility of a fourth child. I know it's only two for me, but whether it's a boy or girl, we are finished with having kids. I feel at peace with it, but also torn up because the baby you get at the end of a difficult pregnancy (like mine) is very rewarding. I am sure I will go through a grieving process after I have this next child in a way, but honey I do understand where you are coming from, and what you are trying to express in your post.

It's not inappropriate at all honey, I'm really glad you shared your feelings.

xxxxxxx

[Angel]

awww,I am glad you shar e your feelings which I think are completely normal!I had them wit Teo,I didn't want another baby,but as he was only a few months old I found myself wanting to be pregnant and hold a newborn again.I think maye it is hormones,maybe is natures way of ensuring that we procreate more than just once.I rmeember feeling it very distinctly,but then as He got older it wore off,until hubby and I were ready to have our baby fgirl a couple years later.Anyway,sorry it sucks to feel that way,but it will wear off and you can stillf follow every one elses pregnancies and share it all without all the discomfort and pain LOL.Hugs hunny x

[Georgi]

Gutter - I totally understand where you are coming from OBVIOUSLY I wouldn't change Klara at all but I do kinda wish I had been pregnant with baby2 at the same time as all these great gals....I am envious of their exciting journeys knowing that I won't be going through it again and I know for a fact when they all start going into labour I will have that strange "wanna be them" feeling!!! but I also know with hindsight it will wear off. I love coming over here and reading their posts and almost always I think OoOO!! that happened to me etc....but I refrain from posting all the time bcos I also feel that I have had my time in the spotlight and it's their turn!! Obviously I do post if someone is asking something but I mean generally.

After having Theo my feelings of wanting another baby were amazingly strong....I knew that I wanted another baby so bad and it WAS going to happen the way I wanted it to. I know 100% that the fact Theo arrived through the sunroof contributed to my strong feelings as I will be totally honest I NEVER felt like a true woman having not given birth naturally...I felt cheated and from that day on, I was on a mission!!

Now that I have ticked that box I feel complete, I feel I am part of an exclusive club and I am in tune with every mother that has ever given birth naturally.....no-one can tell me I got it easy now!!!!! But I do have an element of saddness that it's very likely if not definate that I won't be pregnant again...it is truely a life changing experience although like you I CANNOT imagine coping with 3 children, getting out and about with 2 is hard enough and I do want some ME time at some point in my life again!!!! LOL!!

Now I am going to contridict myself because I wouldn't rule out having another baby in a few years time but it's very unlikely as DH is deadly against the idea. However, both hubby and I aren't going to do anything permanent to prevent another pregnancy but after great debate I am going back onto the pill as I cannot and DO NOT want to run the risk of falling pregnant now.....if and it's a BIG if, we were to decide we wanted another then I would want Theo at school!!

I don't miss my bump this time around but I know that as Klara gets bigger and I start to forget little thing's about giving birth I will start to miss it, especially when my closest (off line) friends start trying for baby#2....which will be soon!!!

I totally agree though we need to support each other through these times and Gutter I am right here honey ready with open arms....don't ever feel you are alone with these feelings!!!!

[Gutter]

You ladies ARE the BEST!!!!

It's good to be reminded that these feelings will pass and Georgi I loved how you mentionned not posting in the pregnancy forums much unless they have a question because it is their light which is so right!! It's so hard to stop posting after spending so much time here, hehe!!

[chrisb]

haha, the funny thing is a year or less ago I was looking on the pregnancy forum seeing you guys pregnant having feelings of jealousy although I knew I didn't want to get pregnant quite yet. After I had emy I kept seeing pregnant women out and it made me so want to be pregnant again.

That is part of the reason I don't know if I can stop after this one and I might have to have 1 more, if my body and doctor are ok with it. After we have our last DH is getting a vasectomy. Since I can't have more than 3 csections if that.

BTW speaking of jealousy- Georgi you have no idea how jealous I am that you were able to have a vbac. I want to tell myself that you never know what could happen in this pregnancy and I could go into natural labor at 30 some weeks and have the baby and the baby would be small enough and before I have other complications. But in the back of my head I don't even want to give myself that hope because I know it's like 99.999% sure I can do nothing but have a csection with all the crazy complications my body has. Csections can be such a let down and its the bizarre the feelings of incompleteness or being inadequate that hit you after or when you see other people having natural births especially since csections are kind of looked down at by lots of women. When I tell someone I had a csection they automatically ask if I elected to because of my size. Its like I feel like I have to defend myself by going "no, they thought the babys heart had stopped and I had no choice or say at that point."

My point is i think all of us has some jealous feelings at times because even though we are in the same stage in life our pregnancies are at different times, and our lives have different complexities to them. We share things on here about our lives that sometimes we wouldnt tell our family even, sometimes its about our families. I think the more you open up about your feelings, loves, anger then sometimes you are also opening yourself up to admit to more of those feelings such as jealousy too. So you should never feel bad for it, especially because we all know being moms or wives, you need to get those feelings out somehow and this is just the place to do it.

Hope that made sense.

[Gutter]

Thanks for sharing your feelings too Chris. I actually got cut short on my very first post so I probably didn't get all my feelings out as much as I wanted to.

I really wanted to post something because I think it could be the wanting another baby PP thing, but I know that I couldn't deal with another one and the risk of my next baby having colic would just kill me!!!!

I will continue to lurk and bring up some advice, but that's all, I have to tell myself that I am no longer pregnant, haha!!

[sparkles]

Just to add Georgi- i too found myself sooooo clucky and jealous of pregnant women a couple of months after having Kyrah lol weird as i had a gorgeous baby in my arms, must have just been the whole experience lol

[Lou Lou]

I have felt the same way! (See Gutter, you ARE not alone in this!lol!)
I am pretty sure that we are not having any more children. My DH is very happy with our little family of three even though I think I'd like to have one more. I think all children should have a brother or sister but as they say.... "it takes two to tango"!!!!! : )

I think it's like what everyone has been saying.... it's the whole miracle of it all..... and each pregnancy is a once in a lifetime experience!!!!!

[Toffee]

I get jealous and I've not even had one baby! hehe.

[MommaBear]

I love that we can all share and dish out our feelings without worry or concern. You girls are the best and I would want anyone to be able to share how the feel. And trust me for those of you with two I will be coming a knocking soon for advice and those of you who are on your last I am sure there will be days when I am envious of you having your freedom again. I am in the moment of freaking out trying to figure out how to handle a toddler and a newborn but as a friend of mine who has four just told me. You figure things out just like you did when you got the first one. Please come over anf visit it would be lonely without the wisdom and advice of those who have been there before. I don't feel so alone.

[galaxy]

Gutter, if I end up with another section I have asked to be sterilised at the same time, however I will probably end up feeling like you at some point, I can totally see where you are coming from x

[Ginny]

Wow..yeah, I can relate to, Gutter! (Although, I must say it was before Thane turned 1, i have had NO DESIRE in the slightest for another since then! ) AND HELLO EVERYONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW, i haven't been on here in months!!! Maybe once for Georgi and that is IT! HI!!!!!! Hope everyone is great!!

I do believe though that after you have your baby you are in the baby zone and having baby fever from the highs of birth and the pregnancy. But, to me, the longer i get away from it, i am happy and just enjoying my 2 year old So, yes, even though i can VERY much relate to that jealous not being able to feel the baby kick ever again, or not ever experiencing the amazing joys and love of birth ever again, i must say, i am happy with what I have Hang in there! Baby fever and jealousy will go away with time I THINK!!!!

[Leeaman]

I get jealous and I've not even had one baby! hehe.

I agree with you hun...lol

[galaxy]

I don't know what to say but ((((((hugs)))))) to both of you, I hope you are the ones to take over those threads at some point, I really do

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