I want to leave him

m

awww, galaxy, im so sorry you feel this way. i know you said you are scared to talk to anyone about it, but have you talked to him about it? i dont know yalls situation so i cant say, but maybe he doesnt realize how badly you are feeling? if so, and you truly hate him, i dont see how you can ever be happy in the relationship. i know being a single mom would be rough, but do you think it would be as bad as you feel now? i think you need to weigh out to pros and cons of being in the relationship, and being a single mom and see which one has more benifits.

please do come back when you have more time, or he isnt home if you dont want to post with him there, and let me know how you are doing.

i dont know if you ever use a messenger, but im almost always on if you need someone to talk to (that goes for anyone here, i dont mind my messenger being public!)

AIM: ThePenguinsMine
MSN: PleasantPenguins@hotmail.com

{hugs}

awww hun i am really sorry you are going through this and i truly hope you can work it out or be strong and leave him, however i can understand what a hard decision that is having to start a new life supporting yourself etc
You need to be happy that is the main thing, have you and hubby talked about this much?? do you think it is worth saving or not?
do know that i am here for you and talking about it really might help and know that you are never alone xoxo
Take care of yourself , you are a great mum and a strong person , you can do whatever you decide xo

Oh Honey, I am feel so sad that you are feeling sad babe, I didn't realise all this was going on with you and you say ever since Molly was born thing's just haven't been the same, this means you have been carrying the weight of the world for far too long, this is what we are all here for babe, we aren't here to judge you, we are here to support you! In your heart do you feel that you having nothing left to give? as in there is nothing left to selvidge (sp?) I mean obviously if the answer to this is no, then to say have you tried talking to him about it all has to be no as there would be no point.......oh goodness babe, all I can really say is please come back and let us know what is going on, talk about it as much as you need to, I for one will be waiting and ready to throw my arms around you for a 'cyber' hug!!! x x x

P.S You've still got my number haven't you??? text me if you want, anytime x

Galaxy, I am so glad you took this first step and spoke you feelings out loud. Please come back and talk more when you have more time.

xxx

Thanks for the kind words everyone. I'm so sorry about my rant the other day, just everything is getting on top of me and I feel I am going to break. I have been taking everything out on my poor husband lately, there is so much going on. I have problems with my parents too because of their drinking and I think I am just diffusing all my anger towards him. I think everything is ok really and we are off work this week so we are spending some quality time together. It's our 3rd anniversary on Wednesday and his parents are having Molly so we can go out to a restaurant. I love him dearly but I'm at a very low point and feel I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. I did talk to him and he booked me in to go and have my hair done and booked for the house to be cleaned so I think he is realising that I feel so low.

sorry things were so bad galaxy.glad that he seems to be supporting you a little now though.hope it gets better

Hey hun, I hope things are a bit better for you, i know what you re going through as ive been in a similar situation, all i can do is send you hugs and let you know im here for you anytime you want to vent! xoxox

Here's a blind lunge... but this sounds familiar to me. Kinda like looking into a mirror of the past in a way.

If you can keep talking with him he will have more to work with in trying to help you with things. This could be as simple as a fear to communicate + the sense of overwhelming burdens that can accompany a new child in the family. Sounds as if he has been trying to cope with his version of that by being a good father - so he's doing the first things first approach, which you might be able to find comforts you as you go forward.

But it is true that both of you need to be able to talk and vent without feeling "ungrateful" or "selfish" or "unloving" - and particularly dangerous can be the feeling that your need to vent about how much work the little one is somehow translates into your perception that you are rejecting the baby.

See how something like that could take hold? Nothing could be further from the truth, but if you hold it inside, your head can start playing tricks on you - all your hot buttons about personal inadequacies can get hit and then it's a spiral down where any hope of a break for you has in your mind some sense of disloyalty attached to it like a leech. It's not based in reality, but it can still do real damage.

The answer is to get the pressure off when you feel it and not hold it in. As long as he understands that you're blowing your top at your frustrations, and not because of some lifelong resentment against him, he will probably get with the program quickly and help you find ways to vent positively. Sounds to me like he loves you a whole lot and you two need to work on good ways to communicate.