Daycare...

My daughter has been in daycare since she was 5 weeks old. I would have rather waited a bit longer before sending her to daycare of course, but I am so glad she is in daycare now. She began learning to walk before age 9 months, she's very vocal and social, and she enjoys other children and I credit at least part of this to her being in daycare. I know if I were to be a SAHM, I could not provide to her the stimulation she gets at daycare, or the various toys and playcenters they use to help babies develop their large and fine motor skills. I also obviously cannot provide 7 other babies for her to play and interact with for 7 hours a day. I have chosen a church-based center to place my child in. The teachers and staff are kind, gentle, and genuinely love children. It helps that I work there too, so I am able to visit Kenadi or check on her at certain times throughout the day, and even nurse her on my lunch break.

I'm just wondering what everyone else thinks....What are your views on daycares? Do you think daycare allows children to grow more developmentally? Will you send your child to one and if so, at what age? What is important to you in a childcare center?

Also, I found this article in my latest issue of Parenting magazine, which really reinforced my ideas about daycare and made me feel even better about the decision I had to make to put her in a childcare center:

"Daycare Perks - 3 Reasons It's Good For Your Kid"

1. It'll make him healthier. Sure, he's going to have the sniffles more often than a stay-at-home tyke. But the bugs he's exposed to may strengthen his immune system, which in turn may protect him from chronic conditions like allergies, asthma, and even leukemia. According to a new study from the University of California, Berkeley, kids who attend daycare are 30 percent less likely to develop the most common type of childhood leukemia. The researchers think the immune-system boost from the infections may be why.

2. It'll prep him for school. "Daycare centers are more stimulating and cognitively enriching than in the past," says Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, PH.D., an investigator for a recent National Institutes of Health study that found that at age 4, kids who'd been in daycare did better on literacy and number-skills tests.

3. It'll jump-start his social life. Daycare tots learn to be more cooperative and are more assertive than kids who stay home. Because they have to get along with lots of other children, they learn they don't always come first and how to make friends, says Hirsh-Pasek. A lesson always better learned sooner rather than later in life!

-Laura Sullivan

Thats really interesting!

Jesse has just started going back to daycare this past thursday, he will go 2 arvos a week until he feels comfortable then by the time he starts school in 2 years he will have been going 5 days a week. He has never been apart from me and i hada him in daycare last year he was 19 months but after 8 weeks of working i had to give up as he just went mad, wouldnt sleep wouldnt eat, he got really stressed. I was to blame as i hadnt even let him go with my mum for an hour.

Kieran will be starting daycare at about 7 or 8 months old just for a couple of hours a week to get use to being away from me and also build a relationship with the staff at daycare.

My SIL put her daughter in at 6 weeks of age and she is 5 months younger than jesse and she is such a good kid, has no problem sharing etc, speaks nicley when she wants something she is there from 8.30am - 5pm

I think its great for them to learn social skills at such an early age, and youre right, there is no way we could provide all this at home.

Hey Mum of jj

Sorry you had so much trouble keeping Jesse in daycare, that doesn't sound like much fun

I think 7 or 8 months is one of the best times to put a baby in daycare, so that's great for you and Kieran! (BTW, I love that name) I think it's good you are starting him off slow so he can adjust better. Of course, since my daughter (K) went so young she didn't really need an adjustment period. Now that she's 9 months though, I have to really be careful about leaving her. We have a little routine we do when I leave. I take her in to daycare about 30 min early (8:30) and play with her so she can warm up to the other kids for a bit, then I'm supposed to clock in at 9, so at about 8:50, I put her in her highchair and get her breakfast ready and I can usually feed her a few bites then turn it over to one of the teachers and they finish feeding her, which keeps her distracted long enough to forget that I left. She does have stranger anxiety so this keeps her from crying everytime I leave.

That's nice that you know a child that's gone to daycare and is very well-behaved. I think child care centers are a great place for kids to learn what's right and wrong, behaviorally, and of course the never-ending learning that takes place there is nothing short of amazing (there are 1 year olds here who can say sentences!). Plus, in my case, I can trust that she's also being taught good values and morals. I have to be honest with myself and admit that the staff ARE partially helping raise my child (I mean, she's there 7hrs/day 5days/week) so it's comforting to know that they are teaching her the same things I will be teaching her and helping raise her the way I was raised Just a note: This is not to say that daycare teachers should raise other people's children. That's not what I'm saying at all, so hopefully I'm not misunderstood here

well ... i am a director of a child care centre and speaking from my 8 years in charge, child care is great for SOME kids. To be honest it all comes down to how long they are in day care, how many hours, how many days and for what reasons. i think its great for social reasons once the child is a bit older. and the year before scool or pre school is great to teach the children and prepare them for school, but from personal experience, most of the children who come five days a week, for more than 8 hours a day and from a baby until shool aged, had MASSIVE behaviour problems ( however NOT ALL, most) again it depends on how they are looked after and spent time with at home
Of course child care does help with things like, helping to toilet train etc. So i am not meaning to offend anyone at all, it also depends on the staff at the centre and how the centre is run etc. So there are so many factors, just my personal oppinion.
I would probably wait to put Kyrah in child care until she was three and then just a day or two a couple of hours for social interaction. however some people have to go back to work to provide for their family so i completly understand and i worked with so many beautiful children and families too!!!! Its just the people that abuse the system that annoy me as it affects the children sooo much and the behaviour problems are getting worse each year.....but i suppose that come down to parenting not child care
I hope you find fantastic centres that you and your children are happy with, thats all that matters
xo

i do agree, Child care can teach your children so well, i use to teah the preschool age and they were sooo ready for school at the end of the year etc and like i said some chilren thrive in child care xo

I agree Sparkles. There are lots of parents here who "abuse the system" as I think you said. They can't wait until we open to bring their children in and then they wait til the very last minute to pick them up. Makes me sad :(

K goes to daycare when I go to work in the morning (around 8:30-9am) and her dad goes in to work way early (3am) so he is able to pick her up around 3 or 4pm and sometimes as early as 2pm if he doesn't have things at the house to do or whatever. So I guess she's there anywhere from 5 to 7 hours a day and it's 5 days a week. Actually, it'd be 4 to 6 hours a day, if you count my hour break when I either take her home with me or at least go in and play with her for the whole hour. And I work til 6pm, so that's the perfect opportunity for her to have "daddy time", when he picks her up early. It works out great for us.

And I agree that it does come down to parenting in the end, when you're talking about behavioral issues. There's only so much the staff at a child care center can do.

PS, I think it's so cool that you're a director!

Yeah i completly agree with you, there is only so much staff can do!! that fantastic that K can see you at lunch and have daddy time, sounds like you have it all planned out which is awesome, i suppose you understand where i amcoming from with working there yourself, what do you do there???
yes i have loved looking after kids and i am thinking of doing some part time work back at my old centre next year as relief director, will see how i go.... i love looking after the kids but some times there are alot of "politics" "unrealistic expectations" for stff in the indutsry, they give you sooo much work to do, its hard to find time with the kids....it should go back to beig about the CHILDREN!!!! i dont know what its like in other countries but sometimes the system tries too hard to be perfect that it backfires and ends up making it worse for kids ...sigh lol

Right now I am doing a bit of everything. I'm basically like director's assistant. I answer phones, do all the bookkeeping (tuition payments/fees, attendance, childrens files/info, food program), watch over the cameras (security cameras in each room and around the outside perimeter of building) and let people in (I have to push a button to release the door, so that other people that aren't supposed to be in, cant get in). I also sub for teachers in various classrooms. I try to stick to the younger classes when I do get an opportunity to sub, as I'm much more comfortable w/them than w/older children (the older ones tend to have more attitude problems and general rebellion that I don't put up with very well!) I've done all the training that the teachers are required to do, though it was only an option for me. I'm also starting classes in January to get a little more under my belt as far as experience and certificates and such. I love my job and hoping I can find a way to move up the ladder

I think that daycare or pre-school is necessary for many families, a lot of mums have to work and don't have a choice, and can't be at home. I agree with Sparkles though, that so many children spend way too much time at daycare, which does cause severe behavioral issues. I think that children who don't have other siblings greatly benefit from a few hours of pre-school interaction each day. But many children who go full time to daycare develop behavioral issues such as aggression, problems with authority, ect. There are some who remain angels no matter how many hours they spent at daycare, but that seems rarer.

I think it's great that you work at the daycare your daughter attends, you are there if she really needs you and you can nurse her at lunch. She gets to socialize, but still have that feeling that you are nearby. I think its great that you are friends with the staff, and you know how they interact with your daughter during the day. So daycare is the right fit for your daughter, and she sounds well balanced and happy. Under these circumstances, I too would allow my daughter to go to daycare.

However, not all daycares are good ones. I have worked with staff when I was a daycare aide, that should never have been working with kids, they were not warm, patient, or nurturing at all. In regards to what Sparkles said, about parents abusing the system, my husband's ex wife works the minimum amount of hours the U.K. government will allow her to work and still receive full government benefits, which I think is 14 hours or something. Since my step-son was 2, he has had his daycare paid for by the government, and even though his mom only works a few hours a day, he is left at daycare from 9 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. everyday. He started hitting, kicking, throwing tantrums, and bullying other children as a result. We finally got him to the point where he would behave at our house when we had him for a weekend, because he knew he could not get away with such behaviors. I think it is sad when BY CHOICE, mom's or dad's who are able to stay home and not work, dump their kids off all day at a daycare, so they themselves don't have to parents for the day. That makes me sad.

I do think that socialization with other children is important for kids. I plan on having a play group with learning activities for my daughter and her friends a few times a week when she gets a bit older, and get other mom's I know who stay at home with their kids, to participate, and trade off hosting it at their house. I don't want to pay an outside pre-school or daycare, it is expensive. My daughter still gets the socialization this way. Plus, I plan on having more children, so once that happens, she will be socializing and learning to share, ect, so I won't really be concerned that she isn't learning socialization skills at home.

I think kids should be allowed to play for as long as possible, and not be pressured into school from a young age. I realize that there will be some who differ with my opinion, but we spend a significant part or our lives in a classroom, and it is my personal belief that the longer kids play and spend time with family, the better. I don't think my learning abilities have been compromised, having been a person who did not attend pre-school or daycare. I learned to read from Dr. Seuss books at home, and I skipped 8th grade altogether. Not bragging, just making a point that I think letting kids play at home can be just as beneficial as pre-school for some children. All kids are different, it is at the parent's discretion whether or not their child should go to daycare.

I definitely agree that not all daycares are good ones! I'm very proud to say that I think our daycare is the best in the county, and that's not to brag (as it doesn't matter much to you all anyway, lol) but just honestly speaking...we're quite blessed. I also think it's really really sad to see parents leave their kids the maximum amount of time when it's not even necessary that they be there. At our daycare, we have a 10 hour max. each day. We're actually open from 6:30am to 6:00pm, 11.5 hours and if any child is here more than ten hours a day, we charge them a pretty high fee for that. That's just to try and prevent the whole situation and also b/c by regulations given to us by DHS, we have to maintain a certain child/staff ratio and if too many kids stay the whole day, that's impossible to do without making every teacher stay the entire day, which obviously is more than an 8-hour shift! We are also non-profit. Our church is the base for the whole child care center - it was opened really for the benefit of people in our church - people needing childcare AND people needing jobs. And children are very close to the heart of our pastor and our church family, so it was obvious what needed to be done!

I also agree that daycare can be extremely expensive. Alot of people settle for a cheap daycare but it's often not what you would call "quality care", and that's sad too because it's usually all the family can afford. I think playgroup is a good alternative to daycare. It allows the child to have that interaction without the cost of daycare. Tiff, are you a SAHM? I also think it won't be such a big deal once an only child has siblings...as you said, they will learn alot of those things just by having to share their parents time and attention! I do still think even if a child has siblings, it's still important to have playgroup or some other outside activity that's separate from siblings. My sister lets each of her children have a "thing" and I think it's a great idea because it not only allows them to be a little more independent of each other, but it also gives them one-on-one time w/a parent. Like, my sister takes her youngest to a playgroup once a week and she leaves the other kids w/her husband. Then another night, she takes her daughter to soccer and then for a quick dinner after. I think it's wonderful to separate them out like that and give them each their own hobby or activity, whatever you want to call it. Also fosters creativity, IMO, as they can choose what they want to do - doesn't matter what it is!

I also agree that kids should be allowed lots of play time. Children learn MOST through play and interaction and that has been proven in just about every study I've heard of. You get a lot more reaction from a child when you teach them through play rather than teaching from a book in a classroom. It's not hard to see why, either. I DID attend daycare and preschool and was reading at an early age and started school early as well (making me the youngest in my class, which was kind of a drag!) So I guess it just depends on the child and what they are exposed to (like you, with the Dr. Seuss books). I'm glad I got the chance to be at daycare/preschool b/c I wasn't exposed to stuff that had anything to do w/learning at home.

I guess I can just see what daycare is doing for my daughter and I thought I would see if anyone else has their child in daycare (or is thinking about it) and what their opinion is of it. Anyone here who currently has a baby/toddler in daycare?

Wow sounds like you are with a fantastic centre, lucky you!!!! and i love the 10 hour rule, i have never heard that before
Glad that your enjoying your work too xo

Well where i live we are a town of about 5-7 thousand, we have 1 daycare, 1 kindergarten and 1 playcenter, at playcentre the parents have to stay with the children, at kindy its for 3 and 4 year olds and is 2.5 hours for each age a day and daycare is for parents that work etc and operates 8.30am-5pm. Its broken into two sessions, 8.30-12.30 then 12.30-5, its $5.00 an hour per child or $12.50 per session. Its a fantastic daycare! it doesnt have classrooms, the under twos bit is sectioned off from the rest by a waist high gate and has its own seperate outside, then the rest of it has a bigger playground for the over 2s and tables blocks etc, the kids have a free run of the place but the teachers make games out of everything while they are learning, they focus on the school prep at age 4.
I feel really comfortable and as i havnt been there for over a year when i took jesse in the other day they all remembered him and me, and made Kiers feel really at home too. I am a SAHM so have had jesse all to myself, i have been lucky yo be able to do that, but he HAS to go, he needs the social interaction and to be honest he has been doing my head in, so the space will be good. As for Kiers he will only go for a couple of hours a week just to get use to being away from me as he is not able to go to any family as they all work. I do not want to make the same mistake i did with jess as jess is soooo clingy!
so i think it will be great for both of them and i can also focus on giving both kids a little bit of 1 on 1

Mum of jj, that's excellent that you've found somewhere you're comfortable with! That's the gripe I hear the most I think. I work at the front desk of our child care center, so I intercept alot of people for the director, people who want to tour our campus/facilities and want to talk to us about the center and maybe enroll their children. They say they just cant find anywhere they are comfortable with. Alot of people seem instantly comfortable w/our daycare just because it's Christian-based, which is really not good IMO! I mean, we have a GREAT daycare, I can't stress that enough to people, but still...I dont think one should assume just because a church runs the daycare that its going to be perfect. I think its important for a parent to be involved and follow their gut when it comes to choosing someone to care for their child. It's a big responsibility to hand over to someone else for the better part of the day!

Thanks Sparkles Yes, the ten-hour rule is a good one! I had never thought of a daycare even NEEDING that kind of rule til I worked at one and realized just how long parents will actually leave their children in someone else's hands just to have more time to themselves. Again, VERY sad But then sometimes, I almost think...better to have them here than at home, for fear of their parents just completely ignoring them, you know? If they're willing to leave their child at daycare all day unneccessarily, then do they really pay that much attention to them at home? Sorry to offend anyone who does that...yikes!

hey i completly agree rylee mack -some children sadly are better off in child care, i have seen it too many times!!!! some people DO NOT deserve to have children

Mum- fantastic, your system sounds great and having one on one time with each child sounds great!!!