Ready to Pull My Hair Out!

Owen's sleeping patterns are getting better at night but worse during the day and the initial going down for bed.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T TAKE MUCH MORE OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love him dearly but - OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JUST SHUT YOUR EYES AND GO TO SLEEP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Today he only took one nap so he was fussy ALL DAY LONG!!!
I just feel like all I do all day is try to get this kid to nap or quit crying because he is so dang sleepy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can barely function. I haven't been properly dressed in days..... my relationship with my husband is pretty much non existent because every time we even look at each other he wakes up. No one has to worry about me getting pregnant any time soon because you have to have sex in order for that to happen and there is NO SEX going on in my house.

I just needed to vent! I'm sorry, girls! All I do is complain about Owen and our lack of sleep. It's just that it consumes all of my days/nights. We can't go anywhere or do anything because of our cranky, unrested child.

It's really starting to depress me and I've noticed that when nap time or bed time roll around I start to get anxious and I usually end up crying. I've probably cried as much as Owen has today. I know on some level that it will get better but the stress of it all is really wearing me down.

Ok. I'm done.

*hugs*

Lou -Lou, even though Owen is being a little fussy lately have you been out anywhere? I know it puts you off bcos when Theo had his fussy days I thought how the heck am I going to go out with him like this, however it did seem to change his mood and everytime we go out he is able to go longer in-between feeds and he has naps.

Theo has been fussy the last 2 days and he is fighting going to sleep, I know he's tired and I think he does too but he gets himself all stressed out. Owen sound's like he is doing a simular thing....during the day I have had to cuddle him until he falls a sleep then I put him in his rocker, he only has 3 naps during the day and they only ever last 10-20 minutes but he is sleeping through the night and that is how I would prefer it.

At night when I put him down after the usual routine, he cries, I have been leaving him to cry for 1 minute and then going in his room, saying nothing to him, no eye contact just putting his dummy back in his mouth and rubbing his chest then walking out, the last 2 days I have had to do this about 6 times before he finally gives in....I don't know what's up with him as he usually goes to sleep straight away without a problem but what I am doing seems to be working???

They reckon it takes 3 days for a baby to settle into a routine.....maybe it is worth putting him in his bed when he shows signs of being tired during the day, I know he'll cry and it will break your heart but try the method that I do at night.....after a few days of doing this he might then start napping when you put him in his bed as he will see it as the place to sleep?

Ohmigosh honey, I felt EXACTLY like you do now, when LM was the same age as Owen is now. Did you ever get that book, Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child? It helped us solve our problem, it was awesome. It isn't a sleep schedule, just gives pointers on dealing with sleep issues, what to expect at certain ages, ect. I remember the days of putting my baby down as carefully as I could, and she would be dead out, then wake up as soon as I touched the mattress, or a few minutes after putting her down. I wanted to scream, cry, pull my hair out, you name it. I love this book because the doctor who wrote it actually experienced first hand a child with sleeping issues like Owen and LM, his own first born son was colicky and everything. He even recalled that he had to get a stool in order to lean over and put his son in his crib, because the creaking and leaning over the crib rail would wake him up.

Do you have a fan in Owen's room at all? Is he in his own room yet, or is he still with you and DH? LM always has a fan going, and it REALLY helps, as her room faces the parking lot. I keep the baby monitor out in the front room so I can hear if she starts to wake up, then I run in and replace her pacifier, and she usually sleeps another half and hour to 45 minutes for naps. The fan blocks out the outside noise, as well as the noise of us in the house. It really helps that LM has her own space now, I know it isn't always possible for everyone to have a 2 bedroom place, but I swear to you, it's been so much easier since she has her own room.

Owen should start to develop a morning nap soon, at least an hour. You won't see a second afternoon nap that happens regularly around the same time, until about 4 months old or so.

Honey, I know the crying breaks your heart, but it sounds like it may be your only option now. I finally got so sleep deprived, that I buckled down and let L.M cry, and it was hard, but now we all sleep so much better, and DH and I are able to have more time together.

Owen is definitely over tired. Start watching for signs of him needing to go to bed earlier, if he isn't already, between 6-8 pm.

Good luck honey, you will get through this, I promise.

Love,
Tiff

Thanks for your responses. I think you are all right on some level.
Georgi - I used to get out him with several times a week but for the past two weeks we've only gotten on twice. I'm just exhausted and I've had a migraine for about 4 days (typical for me) so I don't feel like getting out. However, I am dressed and ready to go as soon as his "nap" aka "crying fit" is over and I feed him.
I'm not sure where we are going but I've got to get out of this house!
I went to the bookstore about 2 weeks ago to get that book, Tiff, but they were out so I will check another store today and if they don't have it I'll order it.
The book I was using, The baby whisper, was working really well for us and everything just went to hell as soon as we got him out of that stupid car seat.

He went down with less fighting last night but was up at 2-3 and then at 5:40 and then up again at 6:15. I finally put him in the guest bed with at 6:15 and nursed him to sleep and we slept until 8:45. We both needed the rest.

So far, he has cried completely through both naps and has gotten no sleep.

Thanks for the support

Oh man honey, hang in there. I also think you should get out for a bit. If Owen gets too upset trying to go down for his nap, I.E. crying for half an hour, I suggest getting him up, and try laying him down again within the hour. Once babies are screaming, it is already too late, they are over tired and have their second wind, it's light outside, so they won't nap. Night time is different, I think it's o.k. to let them cry it out (controlled crying of course) for as long as is necessary, because it is dark, and they usually give up and fall asleep. Make sure his room is pitch black as well hun, no night light, it does wonders.

I suggest darkening his room as well with a black out shade, or dark curtains, this is also something that helped LM to nap well in the day time, and also it helps extend her morning sleep by 45 minutes or so.

I really really think the book will help you sweetie. It doesn't lump babies into one category at all, it talks about his statistics with easy tempered, intermediate, and difficult tempered babies.

Let me know if you need anything, I am right here for you.

You are a great mommy, keep it up hun.

Today was a better day. My anxiety level was much lower. Last night after my post I really think I was on the brink of a panic attack. But today, we got up and got out as early as possible. We went to a couple stores and I got some lunch and then I went to the grocery and stopped by to see an old client of mine. Owen only took a brief nap in the car and he was whiny today but I just decided that I'm not going to fight him anymore. I can't. It's making me mental!!!!! I'm going to attempt naps at his normal nap time but if he's still awake after one cycle of 3, 5 and 10 minute cries, I'm just going to bring him back to the living room.
Tonight I gave him a little extra cereal and I gave him a bath with lavender and I let him splash and play for a really long time. I laid him down awake and I haven't heard a peep out of him. Of course, it's only been 20 minutes but that's an improvement from last night. Now we just have to get him to sleep through the night!!!!!

Tiff - I do keep his room very dark. I have just a tiny bit of light from the baby monitor but it's on the floor so it's almost completely dark. I also have dark drapes in the room that block out almost all of the light during the day. I don't have any white noise any more but I may need to add it back to our routine.

My DH is also being really great. He takes Owen almost as soon as he gets home and he encouraged me to work out tonight when I told him I thought I needed to stay home and give him a break! The work outs help me sooo much!

I know I say this all the time, but thanks so much for being here for me. I honestly don't know how I could get through this without you all!

LouLou