What do you do when you want to move, but your significant other won't?

I have decided that I do not want to spend the rest of my life in Arizona. Hubby doesn't want to move just for the sake that he's sick of moving. We are losing our job here, we are stuck in a lease until November 2009, argh! DH said to give him next summer here at least, and then we'll try to figure something out, but I know he's just saying that to hold me off for a while.

I'm sorry but I need mountains and trees and 4 seasons. I really do. I found a place that is so pretty and has mountains which is a stipulation of DH's, and it's not too expensive. Look at this picture!!!!

Wenatchee, Washington:


I find myself wanting a simpler life. Chickens, hiking and rafting close by, ect. I don't HATE it in Arizona, but I don't want to stay here. We have nothing keeping us here, no ties no family, nothing. I guess I am such a Sagittarius I need change and adventure, and I don't feel that our area offers much I need to be able to just drive a short distance and hike and explore, I am really bored here.

Any way, at least tell me what do you all think? I didn't want to post this in relationships because I am not pissed off or anything, it's just turning point that we aren't agreeing on at the moment.

Ok,as you know,Dh and I sometimes clash over wherewe want to be,we both have families worlds apart yet ultimately we want the same thing.A ranch in the middle of LOT Sof landvery isolated,nice weather,animals and sealed off in our own little world,inviting in only those who we choose.We would make it our haven,outdoor barn with a massive playhouse/games room,stables, pool veggie garden orchard.Somewhere warm but not too hot,maybe near on on the side of a mountain/We have yet to choose thelocation.BUt I would suggest that you and hubbt strat here.

Sit down with a pen and paper and ask him what his dream house is (ranch,townhouse,apartment,cottage) go into geat detail with size,number of rooms,type of gardens,then move onto climate,what he would like (seasons?snow?sun)
then go onto,how close you are to towns/big cities,whatyou consider to be neccessary to be close to.List off in order of priority.

Then compare notes.Just fro dong this you should have a shotlst of possible locations in he states.I mean for example,if he sais he likes only sunny climates,washington is pretty much dead.BUT if you want to live somewhere where you can go rafting or that is mountainy,you could suggest somewhere with both?The good thing about america is that is has everything.Take that and work from there but make it a fun conversation,dream big,not a tedious stubborn argument,both must compromise in my opinion.That,from your list of possible laces that encapsulate a litle of BOTH of what you want,then you can start listing off places and mabe reasearching the pros and cons online of each on citydata.com?

The great thing about Wenatchee, Washington, is that it doesn't get that constant rain that Seattle gets, it's sunny and has long Springs and Autumns, and gets snow, but winter isn't long. Summers are beautiful, they are hot, reaching 100 degrees at some points. My friend and her husband are from there, they are out here in AZ going to dental school and they love it there.

It's got about 60,000 people so not huge, yet it has a mall, movie theater, Costco, ect. It has hiking, lakes, rafting, and ski resorts. It's so so beautiful there.

I will take your advice Angel, we will sit down and do as you said He just straight up doesn't want to move again, he said that he's sick of it, but I can't see myself happy here for long.

what if you could compromise? I mean, I know you are stuck in your lease right now so why not start preparing for a move in 6 months or so? That would give him time to mentally gear up for it and it would give you something to look forward to instead of just sitting wondering when, if.... etc..... You could even start collecting info on things to do in the town....
I like angel's idea of getting him involved in the looking process. How fun to think that you three can go ANYWHERE you want to go! That sounds so exciting to me! Because of my DH's work we will always live in about 1 of 3 places!!!!

You might also consider Oregon, especially the Portland/Hood River/Eugene areas. I'm from there, it's very beautiful and has a somewhat better climate than Seattle although it's close. Not quite as much rain, temperate summers with maybe 2-4 days at/around 100, average of 75-80 in the summer. Some snow in the winter but not tons, Lots of hiking/fishing/boating/skiing/etc all around. Where we are now in the Seattle area isn't bad, a bit wetter than Portland but not by tons.

Oregon is a bit too expensive for us, unfortunately. I think it is so beautiful there though, I would love it.

We are looking now at Colorado, Wyoming (again), and West Montana. The problem is just finding a job, but if hubby is doing an online masters program anyway, it doesn't matter where we live to be honest.

We talked a bit more last night, and he said that he feels that Washington state has too high of tax, so it's probably a no go, which makes me sad 'cause Wenatchee is so gorgeous!!!!!!

Wow that place was really nice Tiff. I can't tell you where to move too because I know nothing about the states because I'm in Canada, but I would love to visit Maine someday It's only about 10 hours from here and now that we have a new car, maybe we can make our dreams come true by visiting it one summer I'm really sorry to hear that DH is being hard headed and hope you can both agree on some place that has 4 seasons!!!

Oooh! I love Colorado! We ski in Breckenridge and I have an aunt that has a "winter" home there.
Mel, we went to Maine a few years ago and it was beautiful!
There are so many great places to live and visit in the states. Tiff I think it's really cool that you guys could go pretty much anywhere!!!!

Oh, Tiff that picture is beautiful!! It looks wonderful there and it looks like a great place to live. Maybe when the lease is up to your apartment you guys can move some place else.

We just recently moved because I found a job, but I did a job anywhere in the US at colleges and universities, cause DH and I really didn't mind moving anywhere. We didn't have family where we lived before so for us it was an adventure to move anywhere. This place was picked because of my job here, but we actually love it here and wouldn't mind staying...and maybe even buying a house here some day.

So maybe you guys could look around at some areas and as it comes closer maybe DH will like the idea of moving elsewhere....

wow that picture is stunning and sounds gorgeous i would also LOVE to have 4 proper seasons but i am in the tropics, but i cant complain our beaches are to die for ALL year round, but i would love forst snow and rafting etc etc
good luck with whatever decision you make, i am really intersted in visiting the usa and canada now, the us looks so diverse. One day we will come over
ox

Sometimes you just have to have a little patience, when the time is right for everybody it is right. I am so sorry about the job situation, but I can also see how your husband feels an obligation on the lease....

We know Arizona is not our last stop on the trail. I like it here, but it it has grown up sooo much since we moved here almost 11 years ago. We bought our house/land basically in a tiny neighborhood in the middle of nowhere surrounded by orange groves. Now we are surrounded by subdivisions, and insane traffic from the miles and miles of subdivisions radiating out from this area towards Florence and Casa Grande.

That city you pictured is beautiful, and a great size. Maybe the thing to do would be to sit down with your husband and make out a timeline for your move, what he wants to accomplish before you go, and how to get there from here. That would keep him more focused on your serious goal of getting the heck out of here, and make him a part of your dream too.... you could post it on the fridge like a sticker chart (sorry. its been a couple rough 'mom' days and that damn chart thing just slipped in here..)

ps - no trees but there are alot of trails with cool petroglyphs and stuff in the superstition mountains not far at all from Mesa. Not for June- Sept, but the rest of the year.