Can't deal with it anymore!!!

The need for Klara to take the bottle is even greater now after I have made the decision to stop breastfeeding. I simply cannot cope with Theo's behaviour anymore, now your asking what's that got to do with breastfeeding, well for me it's got everything to do with it.....overall Theo is a well behaved little boy I know he is by far easier to deal with than many toddlers his age, we haven't had or have got any issues with biting, hitting, spitting or pinching which I know are very common habits amongst 'toddlers' but when I am breastfeeding my little boy whom I love with all my heart becomes increasingly more difficult to deal with, we had yet another incident involving nail varnish this morning my poor husbands first day off in ages and he has spent all morning trying to remove the gold glitter nail varnish from Theo's bedroom carpet.

Yes of course Theo was going to feel slightly put out when his sister came along and thankfully he has shown no jealousy directly towards her I have enthusiastically taken on the advice of my health visitor, family and friends on how to involve Theo especially whilst feeding but it's not working and trust me I don't just give up on thing's easily......but I can't fight Theo anymore. Just to name a few thing's, he has broken I think 5 or 6 ornaments, threw coal from the fire all around the lounge covering the cream carpet in black marks, constantly climbs up on thing's to reach thing's he knows he shouldn't have i.e. the nail varnish, throws toys down the stairs (after about 10 times I took ALL of his toys out of his bedroom) thrown picture frames and toys around the lounge, constantly empties the changing bag and chucks the nappies around the room...now you may be thinking all of these thing's sound like typical toddler behaviour BUT he does all these thing's whilst I am feeding I have lost count of the amount of times I have to pull Klara off the breast to stop Theo from doing something he only had the bottle of nail varnish in his hands for literally minutes but somehow he managed to smash the bottle!? I feel as though I am always losing my temper at him, he is a little terror but only when I am feeding.

I could go on and on but then this post would become more about behaviour issues, I just needed to really share my decision with you and gain some support I don't need or want anymore suggestions on how to involve Theo, I have made my decision and will as soon as Klara takes a bottle start dropping a feed so it won't be an immediate thing. My kind of minimum time target was 3 months and all going well I will reach that.

Thanks for listening girls x

Georgi, I also had issues when I first had Jasper, but time outs came in handy lots of times, which I strongly suggest if you haven't tried it yet. I just set a chair up in a quiet area facing nothing and she just sits there quietly for 1 or 2 minutes however old she was at the time. If she wasnt' quiet, she stayed there for as long as she got 1-2 minutes of silence, then she says sorry and gives us hugs and kisses. A nurse suggested buying a baby doll and having Audrey breastfeed her doll, but that never really worked since I think she was still too young to understand, but it doesn't hurt to try....

Anyways those are some suggestions while to try to wean Klara off the boob and hope things with Theo get better!!!

oh hun you poor thing, my friends mum said her son was exactly the same when she would bf her daughter ( 18 months apart)
I am some what expecting this time to be harder in that aspect and havent put high aspects on bf this time, of course i still want to for 6 months if i can but if i cant i wont feel so "guilty"
You have done a fantastic job and if you reach three months thats wonderful. You should be very proud of yourself and we know your not giving up easy or you would have when your were in burning pain when feeding- i know how that feels.

IN the end you have to do what is right for you, Klara and Theo!!!

You have all the support here babe and i hope weaning goes smoothly for you all xo

Honey - you will hear nothing but support coming from this momma!!!! : )
I can TOTALLY see how that type of behavior would make you make the decision to stop nursing! Toddlers are difficult enough when they are being "good"!!!!!
I am always amazed at the trouble Owen can get into even when he's in a good mood and receiving all of my attention.

I just wish there was some way to help you more! I know how important nursing Klara is to you and feeding time is such a wonderful bonding time (nursing or formula feeding) that I hate knowing that time is being spoiled!

I hope that this switch will help. The best part will be how easy it will be to start and stop a feeding plus she should be able to go a little longer between feeds and that may lead to less frustration for Theo!!!!

Please keep us posted on how things go. I'll be thinking of you!

Oh wow, Georgi! So, he only acts like this when you are nursing! D@MN you are lucky! No, i am just joking trying to make you laugh at a difficult time. I don't blame you for wanting to stop nursing hoping that maybe it will curb your anger at Theo and his behavior of taking advantage of the situation...just as thane does when i am on the phone I very much understand what you mean, and you don't want to be mad at Theo all the friggin time!

We are here for you anytime you need to vent and GOOD LUCK on weaning sweet little Klara! She's absolutely beautiful just like you and she will do great no matter what, boob, bottle, cup, or whatever!

Hope it gets easier! XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

I'm so sorry hun.I realise how stressful it is!I really feel for you.He sounds like he's behaving like Teo used to,in fact if you have tkime or inclin to go in the other part opf the mummy forum and find my post "I CANT DO THIS " (sounds familiar?) you will probably see a lot of similarities.I am not about to start suggestion you change his diet.There is reason enough for him to be acting out just by having a new sister and of course being at 'that' age.It was always going to be a tough time for you sweety.I am so sorry it's so stressful! I understand you wanting to give up BFing and I hope you can.I Know I actually only planned to BF for 6 months,but when it came to it,she wouldn't touch forumla and it was (for disorganised me) too much hassle to pump in advance to save up milk for her,so I ended up just carrying on for oncvienience,You msay well find that as youplan to wean her,things get easier.BUt either way you are doing all the right things. You are a very savvy mummy and I know how hard you try! I am so proud of you and I love yuou very much,Can't wait to see you in July and in the mean time,you do what you have to do.No one will judge you for it! <3

Sorry I haven't replied sooner Georgi, I haven't been on my laptop, only my iphone and it's difficult to post on the forum. It sounds so stressful and I totally admire the way you are able to make a decision for your family confidently. I had massive problems with that with my first baby and lots I did was beacuse of feeling guilty with the in laws breathing down my neck so to speak. I will be different this time!! I still don't know what to suggest with regards to her taking the bottle apart from the medela feeder as thats what worked for Molly, but every baby is different. Keep us informed though as it is interesting to see what works and what doesn't. (((((hugs)))))

Thank you....I really needed to vent and I feel so much better for doing so

I have received so much sound advice from friends and family but something a little bit different was suggested to me and that is to try using nipple shields to get Klara used to the teat shape but still breastfeeding...I thought this was worth a shot as you can pick up brand new ones from ebay for next to nothing....also someone else has advised sticking to the same bottle, (chopping and changing 'can' cause added confusion) and just trying it everyday in the morning instead of the evening....well today was day 1 and she didn't scream or stress infact she just smiled at her daddy and played with the teat....this is by far the best result we have had to date. She didn't take any milk whatsoever but we try again tomorrow

Also I am such a fool....when Klara takes the bottle I am going to express the milk so she will still be on breastmilk...I'm such a numpty for immediately stating I am going to wean Klara off breastmilk there of course will be no need!! I think I was just highly stressed when I wrote this post....your support and input is REALLY appreciated and I will of course KUP on how it goes with my little piglet!!

Sounds like sensible advice to me Georgi keep us informed as to what happens!

well done sweety!You will find a way that works for you! Love you xxx

Georgi- I have been with out computer access but I have read (just have not been able to reply ) and I wanted to say that with what ever route you end up choosing you are so admirable with your strength and consideration for your family, you can see in your posts that you have put a lot of thought into what you will do for your gorgeous girl, and either way she will be a happy healthy baby because she has a wonderful mommy and that is the best to be offered! Good luck, things will be ok! xoxo